things i’ve earned, 2021

the orange cat and i have a
love-hate relationship
i have never been good at leaving scabs
the thin red lines that dot 
my hands 
my feet
begin to glow white 
against the August tan
leftover on my skin.
scars

we go to Oklahoma in the summer 
even though we all know from the start
it will end with the two of us 
(fighting)
we last three days before we’re arguing 
in the middle of a shabby chinese restaurant
i hit the table so hard that my egg drop soup 
spatters across the placemats
i scream in the bathroom until my throat burns
(it never goes away)
fortune cookie

we walk by their house
a few nights after the protests
boys like that never lose anything
they feed off of our anger
and unsuspecting bodies
mace

preacher man on campus 
points to me 
and calls me a whore. 
i take the book from his hands
and trace my lips up the spine
bible

my breasts did not grow, 
as i had hoped, 
but it made me feel like i was 
doing the right thing.
vaccine

we lie flat on our backs in her bedroom
the sheets smell like cinnamon
there is no small talk
just laughter and steady breath
companion

hold my hand, paper lover. 
i will squeeze tight as you scrape 
the rot 
from my insides; 
replace it with numbness 
and warmth from your body.
intimacy